Status of Woman in Islam
The Qur'an warns about those men who oppress or ill-treat women:
O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will. Nor should you treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the dowry you have given them - except when they have become guilty of open lewdness. On the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If you take a dislike to them, it may be that you dislike something and Allah will bring about through it a great deal of good. (4:19)
Unlike other religions, which regard women as being fixated of inherent sin and wickedness and men as being possessed of inherent virtue and nobility, Islam regards men and women as being of the same essence created from a single soul. The Qur'an says:
O mankind! Reverence your Guardian-Lord, who created you from a single person, created, of like nature, his mate, and from this pair scattered (like seeds) countless men and women. Reverence Allah, through Whom you demand your mutual (rights), and reverence the wombs (that bore you); for Allah ever watches over you. (4:1)
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, "Women are the twin halves of men." The Qur'an emphasizes the essential unity of men and women in a most beautiful simile:
They (your wives) are your garment and you are a garment for them. (2:187)
Just as a garment hides our nakedness, so do husband and wife, by entering into the relationship of marriage, secure each other's chastity. The garment gives comfort to the body; so does the husband find comfort in his wife's company and she in his. "The garment is the grace, the beauty, chastity or the embellishment of the body, so too are wives to their husbands as their husbands are to them." Islam does not consider woman "an instrument of the Devil", but rather the Qur'an calls her muhsana - a fortress against Satan because a good woman, by marrying a man, helps him keep to the path of righteousness in his life. It is for this reason that marriage was considered by Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) as a most virtuous act. He said: "When a man marries, he has completed one half of his religion." He enjoined matrimony on Muslims by saying: "Marriage is part of my way and whoever keeps away from my way is not from me (i.e. is not my follower)." The Qur'an has given the reason for the existence of marriage in the following words:
And among His signs is this, that He has created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquility with them; and He has put love and mercy between you. Verily in that are signs for those who reflect. (30:21)
Before the advent of Islam women were often treated worse than animals. The Prophet (pbuh) wanted to put a stop to all cruelties to women. He preached kindness towards them. He told the Muslims: "Fear Allah in respect of women." And: "The best of you are they who behave best to their wives." And: "A Muslim must not hate his wife, and if he be displeased with one bad quality in her, let him be pleased with one that is good." And: "The more civil and kind a Muslim is to his wife, the more perfect in faith he is."
The Prophet (peace be upon him) was most emphatic in enjoining upon Muslims to be kind to their women when he delivered his famous Khutbah on the Mount of Mercy at Arafat in the presence of one hundred thousand of his Companions who had gathered there for the Hajj al-Wada (Farewell Pilgrimage). In his Khutbah he ordered those present, and through them all those Muslims who were to come later, to be respectful and kind towards women. He said:
"Fear Allah regarding women. Verily you have married them with the trust of Allah, and made their bodies lawful with the word of Allah. You have got (rights) over them, and they have got (rights) over you in respect of their food and clothing according to your means."
The predominant idea in the teachings of Islam with regard to men and women is that a husband and wife should be full-fledged partners in making their home a happy and prosperous place, that they should be loyal and faithful to one another, and genuinely interested in each other's welfare and the welfare of their children. A woman is expected to exercise a humanizing influence over her husband and to soften the sternness inherent in his nature. A man is enjoined to educate the women in his care so that they cultivate the qualities in which they, by their very nature, excel.
The Shari'ah requires a man, as head of the family, to consult with his family and then to have the final say in decisions concerning it. In doing so he must not abuse his prerogative to cause any injury to his wife. Any wrongdoing of this principle involves for him the risk of losing the favor of Allah, because his wife is not his subordinate but she is, to use the words of the Prophet (peace be upon him), 'the queen of her house', and this is the position a true Muslim is expected to give his wife. In contrast to these enlightened teachings of Islam in respect of women, Western talk of women's liberation or emancipation is actually a disguised form of exploitation of her body, dispossession of her honor, and deprivation of her soul.
Prophet Muhammad said, "Do not beat the female servants of Allah;" "Some (women) visited my family complaining about their husbands (beating them). These (husbands) are not the best of you" and "[is it not a shame that] one of you beats his wife like [an unscrupulous person] beats a slave and maybe sleeps with her at the end of the day." (Riyadh Al-Saliheeen, p137-140). In another Hadith the Prophet (pbuh) said, "...How does anyone of you beat his wife as he beats the stallion camel and then he may embrace (sleep with) her?..."(Sahih Al-Bukhari, vol. 8, Hadith 68, p.42-43).
Violence against women is not an Islamic tradition. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) instructed Muslims regarding women, "I command you to be kind to women." He said also, "The best of you is the best to his family (wife). The Quran urges husbands to be kind and considerate to their wives, even if a wife falls out of favor with her husband or disinclination for her arises within him. It also outlawed the pre-Islamic practice of inheriting women as part of the estate of the deceased.
GENDER VIOLENCE
Abuse in Muslim homes includes pushing, slapping, punching, kicking, beating, bondage, and refusing to help a wife when she is sick or injured. There are different types of abuse (physical, verbal, emotional, etc). Violent behaviors include shoving, pushing, destruction of valuables, hurting pets and loved ones- even children.
Physical violence may lead to broken bones, head injury, vision loss, and death. Among victims, emotional abuse leads to a broken spirit and feelings of hopelessness, helplessness and oppression. Gender violence is not a private matter between a husband and wife that it should be ignored. Domestic violence can lead to the destruction and separation of a Muslim family, which is already so fragile in a predominantly non-Muslim environment. The destruction of one family is the destruction of one unit of the Muslim community. Muslim community leaders or Imams have a duty to help those suffering in this crisis. Not only must we help the sister who is being abused, but also the abuser must be stopped. Gender violence can lead to the murder of a woman, and the murderer will be put in jail. In USA the children would be separated from parents and most probably they will be put in non-Muslim foster homes if this happened.
Battered women should be transferred to the nearest battered women's shelter. One should know if there are crisis hotlines available, as well as shelter houses or safe houses where women can stay if they are trying to escape from a violent husband.
The Muslim community should develop protection plans in order to assess the level of crisis in a home and help women. This is important because when there is an emergency involving a Muslim woman who wants to contact Muslims, shelters and crisis lines can refer the woman to the mosque or Islamic center and the Imam or another Muslim. Men and women have to start taking it seriously and present it in Halaqahs (Islamic study circles) and Imam should cover it in Friday Khutbahs (sermons).
One should remember that the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) was married for 37 years of his life and never hit his wives.
Every Muslim family should be made aware that the Islamic rules of good behavior apply to one's family just as much as to the whole Muslim community.
Shelters for abused women
It is the responsibility of the Muslim community to make sure the mosque or Islamic center is open at all times for abused women to seek refuge in. Muslim women would prefer to turn for help to their community before going to non-Muslim shelters and calling non-Muslim run crisis lines. Only when the mosque is a "safe spot" then only women would consider the mosque as one of their first points of refuge in an emergency. There should be adequate safety in the mosque for women fleeing violence.
In case of crisis there should be contact mechanism as to who should be contacted and how that person should be contacted. In mosques and Islamic centers, support groups should be established for abusers and the abused (disjointedly) so they can share their experiences with other Muslims who may have suffered from domestic violence as well. Wise, responsible, and dependable persons should run this group.
Many Muslims believe that this tragedy doesn't affect Muslim families. This delusion is wrong and it does affect the Muslim families living in North America.
While research on the prevalence of family violence among Muslims is just beginning, Imams, community leaders and social workers across North America confirm that Muslim women, children and men are being affected by this devastating social problem.
Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired?
You can continue to be frustrated, alienated, trampled on or you can decide to follow the word of your Rabb (Lord) and do something about the injustices in the Islamic community hurdled at women, children and just men who defend them. Remember Allah says Oppression is worst than slaughter. The Prophet prohibited oppression for himself and his followers. It is up to you! Just men and just women there is a group that doesn't care about what association your local Masaajids is a part of or your social/economic status. Our collaboration is looking for dedicated, committed, independent thinking and acting people who truly love Allah and try to live by the Noble Quran and Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad (SAW). Just men and just women who understand that any form of abuse is HARAM! Just men and women who understand that anyone who perpetrates abuse and does not repent and then seek help for their problem is a determent to our Muslim communities. Just men and women who understand that rape, incest, beatings, murder/suicides, honor killings, acid attacks, burnings and battering are not just signs of personality traits (that should be covered up) but crimes and should not be covered up by anyone especially our leadership (some continue to ignore what is going on in their communities). Just men and women who no longer will go along with the status quo (male or female imposed) just to 'be in' and help cover up these heinous crimes.
The Qur'an warns about those men who oppress or ill-treat women:
O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will. Nor should you treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the dowry you have given them - except when they have become guilty of open lewdness. On the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If you take a dislike to them, it may be that you dislike something and Allah will bring about through it a great deal of good. (4:19)
Unlike other religions, which regard women as being fixated of inherent sin and wickedness and men as being possessed of inherent virtue and nobility, Islam regards men and women as being of the same essence created from a single soul. The Qur'an says:
O mankind! Reverence your Guardian-Lord, who created you from a single person, created, of like nature, his mate, and from this pair scattered (like seeds) countless men and women. Reverence Allah, through Whom you demand your mutual (rights), and reverence the wombs (that bore you); for Allah ever watches over you. (4:1)
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, "Women are the twin halves of men." The Qur'an emphasizes the essential unity of men and women in a most beautiful simile:
They (your wives) are your garment and you are a garment for them. (2:187)
Just as a garment hides our nakedness, so do husband and wife, by entering into the relationship of marriage, secure each other's chastity. The garment gives comfort to the body; so does the husband find comfort in his wife's company and she in his. "The garment is the grace, the beauty, chastity or the embellishment of the body, so too are wives to their husbands as their husbands are to them." Islam does not consider woman "an instrument of the Devil", but rather the Qur'an calls her muhsana - a fortress against Satan because a good woman, by marrying a man, helps him keep to the path of righteousness in his life. It is for this reason that marriage was considered by Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) as a most virtuous act. He said: "When a man marries, he has completed one half of his religion." He enjoined matrimony on Muslims by saying: "Marriage is part of my way and whoever keeps away from my way is not from me (i.e. is not my follower)." The Qur'an has given the reason for the existence of marriage in the following words:
And among His signs is this, that He has created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquility with them; and He has put love and mercy between you. Verily in that are signs for those who reflect. (30:21)
Before the advent of Islam women were often treated worse than animals. The Prophet (pbuh) wanted to put a stop to all cruelties to women. He preached kindness towards them. He told the Muslims: "Fear Allah in respect of women." And: "The best of you are they who behave best to their wives." And: "A Muslim must not hate his wife, and if he be displeased with one bad quality in her, let him be pleased with one that is good." And: "The more civil and kind a Muslim is to his wife, the more perfect in faith he is."
The Prophet (peace be upon him) was most emphatic in enjoining upon Muslims to be kind to their women when he delivered his famous Khutbah on the Mount of Mercy at Arafat in the presence of one hundred thousand of his Companions who had gathered there for the Hajj al-Wada (Farewell Pilgrimage). In his Khutbah he ordered those present, and through them all those Muslims who were to come later, to be respectful and kind towards women. He said:
"Fear Allah regarding women. Verily you have married them with the trust of Allah, and made their bodies lawful with the word of Allah. You have got (rights) over them, and they have got (rights) over you in respect of their food and clothing according to your means."
The predominant idea in the teachings of Islam with regard to men and women is that a husband and wife should be full-fledged partners in making their home a happy and prosperous place, that they should be loyal and faithful to one another, and genuinely interested in each other's welfare and the welfare of their children. A woman is expected to exercise a humanizing influence over her husband and to soften the sternness inherent in his nature. A man is enjoined to educate the women in his care so that they cultivate the qualities in which they, by their very nature, excel.
The Shari'ah requires a man, as head of the family, to consult with his family and then to have the final say in decisions concerning it. In doing so he must not abuse his prerogative to cause any injury to his wife. Any wrongdoing of this principle involves for him the risk of losing the favor of Allah, because his wife is not his subordinate but she is, to use the words of the Prophet (peace be upon him), 'the queen of her house', and this is the position a true Muslim is expected to give his wife. In contrast to these enlightened teachings of Islam in respect of women, Western talk of women's liberation or emancipation is actually a disguised form of exploitation of her body, dispossession of her honor, and deprivation of her soul.
Prophet Muhammad said, "Do not beat the female servants of Allah;" "Some (women) visited my family complaining about their husbands (beating them). These (husbands) are not the best of you" and "[is it not a shame that] one of you beats his wife like [an unscrupulous person] beats a slave and maybe sleeps with her at the end of the day." (Riyadh Al-Saliheeen, p137-140). In another Hadith the Prophet (pbuh) said, "...How does anyone of you beat his wife as he beats the stallion camel and then he may embrace (sleep with) her?..."(Sahih Al-Bukhari, vol. 8, Hadith 68, p.42-43).
Violence against women is not an Islamic tradition. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) instructed Muslims regarding women, "I command you to be kind to women." He said also, "The best of you is the best to his family (wife). The Quran urges husbands to be kind and considerate to their wives, even if a wife falls out of favor with her husband or disinclination for her arises within him. It also outlawed the pre-Islamic practice of inheriting women as part of the estate of the deceased.
GENDER VIOLENCE
Abuse in Muslim homes includes pushing, slapping, punching, kicking, beating, bondage, and refusing to help a wife when she is sick or injured. There are different types of abuse (physical, verbal, emotional, etc). Violent behaviors include shoving, pushing, destruction of valuables, hurting pets and loved ones- even children.
Physical violence may lead to broken bones, head injury, vision loss, and death. Among victims, emotional abuse leads to a broken spirit and feelings of hopelessness, helplessness and oppression. Gender violence is not a private matter between a husband and wife that it should be ignored. Domestic violence can lead to the destruction and separation of a Muslim family, which is already so fragile in a predominantly non-Muslim environment. The destruction of one family is the destruction of one unit of the Muslim community. Muslim community leaders or Imams have a duty to help those suffering in this crisis. Not only must we help the sister who is being abused, but also the abuser must be stopped. Gender violence can lead to the murder of a woman, and the murderer will be put in jail. In USA the children would be separated from parents and most probably they will be put in non-Muslim foster homes if this happened.
Battered women should be transferred to the nearest battered women's shelter. One should know if there are crisis hotlines available, as well as shelter houses or safe houses where women can stay if they are trying to escape from a violent husband.
The Muslim community should develop protection plans in order to assess the level of crisis in a home and help women. This is important because when there is an emergency involving a Muslim woman who wants to contact Muslims, shelters and crisis lines can refer the woman to the mosque or Islamic center and the Imam or another Muslim. Men and women have to start taking it seriously and present it in Halaqahs (Islamic study circles) and Imam should cover it in Friday Khutbahs (sermons).
One should remember that the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) was married for 37 years of his life and never hit his wives.
Every Muslim family should be made aware that the Islamic rules of good behavior apply to one's family just as much as to the whole Muslim community.
Shelters for abused women
It is the responsibility of the Muslim community to make sure the mosque or Islamic center is open at all times for abused women to seek refuge in. Muslim women would prefer to turn for help to their community before going to non-Muslim shelters and calling non-Muslim run crisis lines. Only when the mosque is a "safe spot" then only women would consider the mosque as one of their first points of refuge in an emergency. There should be adequate safety in the mosque for women fleeing violence.
In case of crisis there should be contact mechanism as to who should be contacted and how that person should be contacted. In mosques and Islamic centers, support groups should be established for abusers and the abused (disjointedly) so they can share their experiences with other Muslims who may have suffered from domestic violence as well. Wise, responsible, and dependable persons should run this group.
Many Muslims believe that this tragedy doesn't affect Muslim families. This delusion is wrong and it does affect the Muslim families living in North America.
While research on the prevalence of family violence among Muslims is just beginning, Imams, community leaders and social workers across North America confirm that Muslim women, children and men are being affected by this devastating social problem.
Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired?
You can continue to be frustrated, alienated, trampled on or you can decide to follow the word of your Rabb (Lord) and do something about the injustices in the Islamic community hurdled at women, children and just men who defend them. Remember Allah says Oppression is worst than slaughter. The Prophet prohibited oppression for himself and his followers. It is up to you! Just men and just women there is a group that doesn't care about what association your local Masaajids is a part of or your social/economic status. Our collaboration is looking for dedicated, committed, independent thinking and acting people who truly love Allah and try to live by the Noble Quran and Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad (SAW). Just men and just women who understand that any form of abuse is HARAM! Just men and women who understand that anyone who perpetrates abuse and does not repent and then seek help for their problem is a determent to our Muslim communities. Just men and women who understand that rape, incest, beatings, murder/suicides, honor killings, acid attacks, burnings and battering are not just signs of personality traits (that should be covered up) but crimes and should not be covered up by anyone especially our leadership (some continue to ignore what is going on in their communities). Just men and women who no longer will go along with the status quo (male or female imposed) just to 'be in' and help cover up these heinous crimes.
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